- They told her about the “miracle of life” in health class, they told her about the use of condoms and how the sperm swims around in the girl and fertilizes an egg. They told her about how it grows in to an embryo, then a foetus and once born it’s a baby. But they never spoke of what she would go through to bring her to where she was at this moment.
- “A few minutes since the last one,” she huffed. Her contractions were narrowing and with each one she felt like she would rip apart ‘down there.’ Her body was glazed in a light sweat that made her round belly radiate like the life inside of her. She was winded from the strain of labour. Her short brown hair flowed about the pillow like a painting. Her skin was a wonderfully warm flesh with blue eyes to witness her miracle. Rolling on to her side, she rubbed her hands over her belly as if to calm the pain. With each breath she took, her belly expanded and shrank. “Nine months… They said it would be nine months, ungh, … two weeks..late then? Ah… ow!”
- Amanda’s eyes closed tight and grit her teeth as another contraction hit. As the contraction continued, her breathing got heavier and heavier until it became a slow moan. She felt her womb rustle around as it was opening her to make way for her unborn. She clasped the moist bed sheets as the contraction went on, her legs squirming as if trying to escape the feeling inside.
- “Huff- huff- o..okay.. huff- that was a long one.. it should be a little bit –huff before the next one.” A moment passed as her senses started coming back to her. She began to think about what led to this moment, why she was doing this and why she put herself in to this unbearable situation. She started to breath slow and deep, trying to calm herself. Her memories began to return to her.
- ------
- Over two years ago, her older brother died in an accident. A year after he died, her parents talked to her about them having another child. When they returned, they asked her if she could have a talk. Her mother spoke, “Dear, do you remember when you said how I lost my light when your brother died?”
- Amanda nodded her head.
- “I … I can’t have another child. I’m going to have to have surgery soon or else I might have more problems.”
- Amanda’s face whitened, “I’m.. I’m so sorry momma. Please, if there is anything I can do to help you, just tell me.”
- Her parents looked at each other and then her father spoke, “We talked about it, and well, you don’t have to if you don’t want to help..”
- “I’ll do it! Anything to help no matter what!” Amanda interrupted.
- “Dear, this isn’t something you just accept. If you would..”
- “YES!” Her face lit up with the chance to help.
- “Be a surrogate mother.”
- Amanda’s expression changed to surprise, “I…” she paused.
- “I…”
- “It’s nine-months right? I basically live like I do now, but get big slowly and it comes out and that’s it right? Just like health class,” she thought for a moment.
- Her father started, “Mostly, but well, you’ll go through some discomfort. I was always here for momma and ..”
- “Okay.”
- “Darlin?”
- “Okay, I’ll give you a baby.”
- A few weeks later, she was impregnated with an egg from her mother that was fertilized with a sperm from her father at her gynecologist.
- ---------
- She flung herself on to her back, reality had come back and she was right in to a contraction. Her hand crept down to her vaginal opening, still nothing. “How much more of this? How much longer is this going to go on?” she cried. “Ow!” She let out a muted cry. As it ran its course, she tried to think of anything to get her mind off of her abdominal pain. She looked down at her huge belly, not being able to see her feet unless she put them in the air. She was naked for all but a shimmering coat of sweat. She caressed her hands over her belly, her baby felt both stiff and hard inside, but like it was a stick wrapped in a soft towel. Its stiffness became most apparent when she tried to sit upright as the contraction wound down. She moved herself back against the headboard of her bed, upright at an angle. From the difficulty of sitting up, she could feel the head pressing down. She still wasn’t ready to push, but it was easy for her to tell that the head was in position resting inside of her hips.
- Though her mother told her that poking at her womb was bad, and that it was best left untouched, she would often poke around herself to see what she could feel. It was hard to figure out what was what but she could always figure out where her child’s head was. At this point however, she pressed around to feel where it is. “Ow… its here, you’re right here.” She giggled a little.
- No sooner was it that after the contraction ended, another began. She gripped the bed and started to bare the pain, but just seconds later the contraction escalated in to the biggest, strongest one yet. “oww..owwww ah.. ah OW OWWW dear jesus OWW OWWW Momma! AHHH AHHHHH AAAH!!” Almost instinctually her legs slid up, spreading her to show. “Ahhhnnnngh.. ahhnggh” she panted hard, “god help me please! Momma, .. momma make it stop hurting! Momma!” At this point, the door to her room opened.
- “Momma, help me.. The baby, take it out please, momma take it out. I don’t want to keep doing this.” Her mother came and set by her side. Rubbing Amanda’s forehead she spoke, “Darling, I know it hurts. I went through this when I had you. You’re doing strong, just keep hanging in there.” Her mother wiped her body down with a damp cloth. “Ok darling, just relax we need to see how you’re doing.” She positioned herself between her daughter’s legs and inserted two fingers. Amanda twitched and grimaced as her mother felt through her body. “You’re almost there, just a little longer and you can start to push. If you have another hard contraction, just call for me okay?”
- Amanda nodded. She spoke, “ok, just a little longer right? I’ll be done, we can be normal again.” She patted her belly. She had been in labor for 20 hours at this point. It was a little before lunch time and the sun shone through her windows. “Maybe, (huff) we’ll be ready for supper!” she joked.
- Her jovial smile turned sour, a silent pain expressed on her face. “Uhhgh.” She took a sudden breath, “Urgnh, urrnngh..” she huffed, “ah god..ooohhh oh…” the contraction subsided. Her mom patted her on the belly. “I’ll be close by dear.”
- No sooner than her mom left, before the door even closed, “OWWWWWWWWWW GOD OWWWW OWWWWWWWWW AHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH JESUS! AHHHHH” She panted hard, “AHHHHMMMNGG MOMMA! AAAGH.. AHHGH FUCK!”
- Her mom stormed back in to the room, “darling?!”
- Amanda snapped up and started pushing her body in to the air as she squirmed from the contraction. She dropped back on to the bed, rubbing just above her vaginal opening at the bottom of her belly, still moaning.
- Her mother called for her husband while Amanda collapsed and became motionless on her bed. The sun illuminated her sweat to a radiating shine. She had these little urges suddenly, but didn’t understand them. Her father entered the room with something in his hand, he motioned with his wife something with this contraption and mumbled something she couldn’t hear. She took the device and he placed himself at the bottom of her bed.
- “Amanda darlin’, do you feel an urge?”
- She nodded as best as she could. He put a finger inside of her, “ok darlin’ don’t try hard now, but just try to go push like your momma told you. If I say stop, stop as best as you can.” She nodded again. Taking in a breath, she made a gentle pause, her face started to pinch. “Yeah, she’s delivering.”
- Her mother lifted her up and sat behind her and spoke, “Lay back on me darlin'” Amanda complied, her compliance motivated by her own confusion. “Bring your knees back to me now.” She spread her legs and lifted them such that her knees almost touched her belly. Her mother grabbed each of her legs from behind the knee and pulled back gently.
- “A little more dear,” spoke her father. Her mother pulled back, she felt her back ache as her vaginal area pitched up slightly. She had lost control of her own movement. She could not get away, nor pitch her position for comfort.
- “Okay Amanda, I want you to look at me okay? You’re a beautiful woman, and you’re doing the most incredible thing you can do. You’re having a baby. But we’re now at the tough part. Its hard, but it’ll be quicker than what you’ve been going through.”
- “Amanda, you’re at the pushing stage. I want you to get used to how it feels first so just push as best as you can. I’ll count down from 3 and say ‘push.’ Just push as you feel.”
- She did her best to prepare, but she honestly didn’t know what to expect. Health class just kind of glossed over how this part was supposed to work. The purpose of contractions was to open up and let the baby out right? Well she’s opened up so just help nudge it? What? Wait, why do I have to push? Why is this going to be ‘the tough part’? Her mind started to race. But no sooner was it that her mind started fleeting than…
- “Three, two, one and push.”
- She closed her eyes, and started pushing. She felt it. It was huge. As she pushed she felt her womb tighten around her baby inside, pressuring it in to her vagina. The further it pressed the more it hurt. She let go, it slipped back in.
- “Again… three, two, one… push”
- Again she closed her eyes and pushed. It pressured her again, it felt so huge, nothing like she ever felt before. As she did this, a contraction hit inducing her, if not forcing her, in to a hard push. “Ahh AHH OWWWWW GOD!” The head started forcing its way in to her, she felt the thickness of it pour in to her with a burning sensation. “GNHAAAAAH AAAH OWWW” The contraction let go. She felt it, its weight nestled in her, the burning feeling subsided a little.
- “Excellent! Good job, keep doing it like that.”
- Amanda kept panting hard.
- “Ok, again just like you did give me a push just like that. Three… two… one push!”
- She exhaled and gripped the sheets, pushing as best as she knew how. At first, it didn’t move at all, but as she kept pushing, the head started to move. “ah AH ah.. ah AH AHAA AAAAH GOD- GOD HELP ME, OWW Make it stop, please!” As she begged, it began to get worse for her. As the head furthered its descent, she began to feel the size of it as the maximum girth stretched her vagina to conform. The hard form of the head weighed heavy in her canal.
- “Incredible job! You’re doing incredible! Its almost crowned! Just give me a few more pushes like that and you’ll be finished!”
- This was wonderful news to her. She tried to adjust herself, but her mother's hold on her kept her in check. But now was no time for her comfort as another strong contraction hit. Her feet pressed against the bed posts hard, “GAH HAAAAA AAAA!! AAAAAAAA! OH GOD IT HURTS SO MUCH, GOAHHH AHHHHHHHHH” The head pushed fully into her vagina, crowning lightly. She felt a body moving in her womb as the head made passage inside of her. Her womb rumbled with the pressure and effort she made. “HMMMMM AHHHHHHHH” The head pushed against her opening.
- She moved her hand to her opening, it was there- inside. A forign object, a forign feeling: her baby. She touched its wet head with her finger and smiled. “I’m having a baby, its really a baby!” She rested a moment. Her breathing deepened. “Ungh, got to push… I got to push, AGH PUSH AHH AHHH” She started to push again, but a new feeling started to pour in to her.
- “AHHH MOMMA, OH JESUS HELP AHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH”
- The head began to push outward, forcing her perineum to try and shape itself, opening her. As the head kept moving closer its shape began to show. She grabbed the bed as hard as she could, pulling on the bed as if to pad her from the duty within, nothing helped. Pushing and pushing, harder and harder, the head didn’t leave her. The shape of the head pressed an outline on her soft irritated skin. She couldn’t keep it up. She let go of the push. “AH AAAAHnnngh” The head slid back in to the original crowned state.
- “Oh no Amanda.” Her mother exclaimed.
- “Amanda you almost had it, you’re going to have to get the courage to do a long hard push. Get the head out and it get easier from there.”
- “I.. I can’t” she exclaimed. “I can’t go any more.”
- Her father looked at the head trapped inside of his daughter’s hips. “Darling, remember why you are doing this? Isn’t it going to be wonderful? We’re going to be so happy with this addition to our home.”
- “I can’t daddy, I…ow uh uhhh uh OW AAAAA”
- A contraction hit and she was forced to push. The pain was go great that even yelling would not help. She felt it, the feeling of being stretched to the point that she never thought possible. The pressure of the head bearing down on her perineum, finally she began to open as her opening started to stretch to the shape of the head.
- “GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH AHHHHHHHHHH! Unf unf” she took a quick breath.
- “Momma, daddy, help me please! Make it stoooAaaaaAAAAAAA”
- The contraction continued and the head pressed fourth, she opened more and more to the point it encircled the top of the head nicely. The bore of the head was immense, once expelled it would be likely that no more room would exist between her legs. Her father lipped, “my god, it's big,” with a slight smirk.
- Once the contraction let go, so did Amanda.
- “Let me stop, just a little, let me stop please.” She puffed. But as she rested the perineum was still stretched, and began to pull the head back into her. She twitched and figited as it started sliding back in. At first it was slow, but it quickly sunk to not much better than the original crowning state.
- “Ok darlin’, I’m going to help, on the count of three, I want the best, hardest push you can manage. Three, two, one, PUSH, HARD!”
- Amanda felt the intensity of the baby inside and pushed as best as she could. She felt the painful stretching feeling again. Pushing, pushing, pushing as long as she could. The head pushed out, against her, the opening shaping to the top of the head but it wouldn’t go further. It was at that moment that she felt the worst stretching pain possible as her father started pulling on her labia forcefully stretching her open. “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! GOD” But with the new clearance, her body took full advantage of this as the head moved further and further out. “CHRIST SAVE ME! AHHHHH HAAA HAAAAAAAW” The largest part of the head made its way with her and slowly, ever so slowly the head slid out.
- In her dazed state, her body signaled to her that the pain had a result. Her hand danced around her opening. Within her thighs she felt a warm, wet little ball. She tried to tilt herself upward to see the head, but her belly was far too large to allow the reward. She suddenly felt the whole of this life inside of her. Almost crying a little, and on her own initiative began to push.
- “Come on baby!” she said.
- She felt the shoulders push against her, her belly fluttering with the intensity. She started nibbling on her lip to cope. It hurt so much, but she was going to get it out. She had to get it out. She wanted to see it. “AAAAHMM AAAAA –huff- huff-“ She felt the shoulders and the body completely filling her inside. Push! PUSH!
- “First shoulder is out!” her father said excitedly.
- PUSH! PUSH!
- “There! ALMOST!! THERE YES!”
- Amanda burst in to tears as her father pulled the rest of the baby out. “Oh god, oh god!”
- “Thank you Amanda darling, you’ve blessed us with another daughter in our home.”
- The room sounded with the cries of both the birth mother and the new life. Amanda's mother whispered thanks in her daughter's ear.
- “Momma let me go now, please.” She pleaded. Her mother gained a glowing smile. “Not yet darlin.” Her father cut the cord and had wrapped the child before setting it down besides its birthmother.
- “No mama, I need to go.”
- “I know darlin.”
- “Ok Amanda, one left to go.”
- Speechless, Amanda gawked as her father placed himself at her birth center. Another contraction welled from deep within her. It was some kind of sick Deja Vu. No matter how much disbelief she bore, the might of the contraction continued until she surrendered. “Hmmmmmmmf!” she pushed. Another round and stiff weight pushed down from her womb. She watched as her belly's shape altered with the push.
- Her push broke and she began panting. The contractions kept up and another one hit. “Aaaaaaoooww,” she shivered as she pushed. The head bore down deep into her, and she imagined the baby moving down as she felt the searing sensation of the head.
- “Great push darlin', great push.”
- Her body slammed her suddenly with a strong contraction just as she finished the push.
- “Gaannnnnnnhhh!” she squeeled as her body forced the push. Seconds became hours and hours became days. The steady and continuous motion the twin's head made down her 18 year old vaginal canal was more than she could bare. It crested its position at a full crown. Her vulva tightly shaped around it, without give. “No more, please no more..” she sobbed, with tears streaming from her eyes.
- “This is the last one, no more pushing when this one is out.”
- She gave up, she wasn't going to do it. Her will to give birth to the twin was gone. She began to think apologies to the life squeezed within her tender walls. Her hips were heavy and stressed. She was tired of it all. “Take me jesus.” She told herself. “Tell me what I should do.”
- “AAAGH AAAaaaaAAAnnnnnngh,” her cries echoed through the house. Her body induced a slow and steady push against the child. She felt herself open up again, passing some unnatural shape from within her body. “AAAaaahhhHHH” her moans continued. As the largest girth of the head began to pass, she bucked while pinned by her mother. Her father had slowed the child's head and begun to pass it out very slowly. Her hand shot to her opening, her lips were not pulled outwards, but flat against her. He was in control of the head's delivery. “Slowly, much too slowly, oh god stop and let it out!” she yelled in her thoughts. “Take it out!” she demanded.
- After a full minute of careful control, the head delivered from within her hips. Her constrained squirm declared her body's protest to the slow delivery of the child.
- “Just the shoulders now hon and you'll be all done.”
- She bore down and put forth a weak push, but it seemed to suffice. She felt the shift in pressure as the child moved and pulled her open. With a sudden surge of water and relief, she saw the second child pulled from within her.
- “A baby brother dear Amanda.”
- Amanda collapsed with relief. Her mother let her legs down, and the loss of weight in her belly a tremendous joy. It was then that her focused led her to the realization that her dad's digital camcorder was perched beside him. Her ordeal was captured, a record of her gift.
- ----
- A short while later, they weighed her baby sister in at 8 pounds, her baby brother at 8 pounds as well and were most impressed with her not sustaining any injuries for birth of 16 pounds of children is no small feat. A week later, the whole family got together to watch the video. Amanda went almost pale as she got to see what she did. Her mother looked to her as she cradled the two fresh gifts in her arms. “Bless you dear for your selfless act.” Still upset over being made to carry twins instead of a single child, Amanda replied, “You never told me that you made me carry twins. I'm not doing that again.”
- Her mother replied, “Just wait dear daughter, you're a woman. You will have a family of your own, so you must do it again and it will be just as special.”
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